They say opposites attract right? But what about when your partner, wife, husband or otherwise beloved thinks that life is life and anyone who thinks there is anything beyond that is a great big crazy person?
Many of us will have come up with this situation. Especially when we have been with a person many years. You may have undergone some transformative spiritual enlightenment, and they trudge on with the dailies, blissfully unaware of the spiritual essence rising up in you. This might lead to arguments. You may feel they don't understand or respect you. They may feel the same right back. You will both blame the other for changing... or for not changing. You may feel they are stuck in a rut, they may feel you are a nut! Either way in a long term relationship the sudden spiritual birth of one partner is likely to cause much ructions...
Then there is the situation whereby you are a single spiritual, perhaps have been for a while, and you meet a new person. You enjoy dinners, cinema, smooching, but the politics of religion, spirituality etc are not broached. Before you know it you are head over heels, and then your intended future life partner comes out with their very strong and solid beliefs in no kind of afterlife, no kind of spirit, no kind of existence beyond human life and planet earth. The bombshell has dropped. What happens next?
Back to the point... opposites attract. But how does this play out in real life. Has this happened to you? IUf so what is your advice. How have your relationships changed, or maybe even benefitted.
My other half is not quite an atheist, nor is he out and out spiritual. I think, to be fair to him, he doesn't have a grasp of it (who really does), and so he chooses to believe in a non-specified 'something else'. I think he is infinitely sensible, keeping his options open - sounds like a fair plan! He doesn't get as down and dirty in the spiritual sauce as I do. We have had our clashes, oh yeah we have! But in general things are rosey and there is a mutual respect for each other's beliefs. If however he was against spirituality, if he thought me writing my spiritual book was barmy, then yeah, we would have had problems! But happily I can see how his leanings and my leanings have in time come closer together. I'm not quite so new age & angel happy as I was at one point, and he is not so 'scientific'. It's a happy medium.
But for those of us who have encountered full on atheist V spiritual in our relationships, what do we do? What is the upshot? I'd like to think we are all brought to the people we meet for a very valid reason. Even if that is sometimes inharmonious and challenging. Perhaps such an unlikely pairing serves no other purpose than to give each other something serious to think about? Perhaps to help us affirm our beliefs, or, if appropriate change them....? But my question is... can it last, can two people of such opposite ilks make it work? Can you sing mantras whilst he build machines?
What are your thoughts can an atheist and a spiritual person be in a happy, committed, loving, healthy relationships? Does love conquer all when spiritual path meets an atheist's brick wall?
Alice Grist - Creator of Soul-Cafe & Author of The High Heeled Guide to Enlightenment & The High Heeled Guide to spiritual Living
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